Lady in my Dreams

2011-09-15T10:11:00.000-04:00

I haven't posted anything in a really, really long time. So, here's a picture of Wonder Woman wearing a pair of Jackie O sunglasses.

A Midsummer Night's Sex Fantasy!

2011-06-21T17:16:00.011-04:00

Update

2011-04-21T18:34:00.000-04:00

Dr. Davide Dragone & Dr. Luca Savorelli Claim Plus-Size Models Make Women Fat

Muahaha! Soon, ALL girls will be fat-bottomed! Then, we shall truly witness the rockin' world go 'round!

Tan-Lines #5

2011-04-21T09:23:00.000-04:00

This is the last of this series.

Tan-Lines #4

2011-04-20T10:09:00.000-04:00

Tan-Lines #3

2011-04-19T12:26:00.000-04:00

Can you Relate to This?

2011-04-18T15:32:00.002-04:00

Tan-Lines #2

2011-04-18T04:52:00.000-04:00

Tan-Lines

2011-04-16T22:09:00.001-04:00

As we get nearer to summer, I want to talk about tan-lines. I can remember back in high school, looking through old issues of Playboy with some friends, when one tried to explain that tan-lines were simply a deal-breaker for him. Of course, I thought he was a) nuts, and b) full of shit. But, he wouldn't budge on insisting that a woman with tan-lines, was scarcely a woman at all.

"How can you stand to look at it?"

Personally, I've always liked to see them. When you see that bright white contrast against an otherwise golden body, you're reminded that you're looking at the most private and intimate part of her body. Tan-lines are like Nature's lingerie.

They're less common now than they were then. Women who pose nude now are more likely to partake in completely nude tanning, probably in a tanning booth. If anything, that makes them more attractive to me now; they have a retro charm, like those '60s and '70s models that JamieLin loves so much. You're much more likely to see tattoos or body-piercings now. Tan-lines belong to a prettier time.

We'll be seeing more of them in the future, though. You'll understand why once you read this article that I found*:

*by "found" I mean, made up.

April 16, 2011--SunCo, the nation's largest tanning salon franchise, announced today a plan to attract a new kind of customer to their service: men who fantasize about being women.

"Crossdreamers," as they are sometimes known, will now be able to realize their gender-bending fantasies, thanks to a new product being marketed exclusively through SunCo franchises. Bikinis sold at SunCo salons under the name brand "Tan-formers" have the ability to magically transform a male body to into a female one--but with a catch. It only works when exposed to UV radiation, and even then, only the radiation coming from a SunCo tanning lamp.

"We're really excited about this new product line," says SunCo CEO Debra Ternsville, "we see this as providing a much-desired service, while also generating a new source of revenue."

Currently, tanning salons represent a multi-billion dollar industry, however, they are not without their challenges. Accusations of increased risk of skin cancer frighten away many customers. Many turn to other methods, such as tanning creams, believing these to be a safer alternative. Some states have even considered adding a tax to salon tanning to discourage excessive use, as they have done with alcohol and tobacco products.

"We've always had male customers, but those were few," Ternsville explained. "When we learned about the rapidly-growing population of Crossdreamers, we asked ourselves, how can we turn them into customers?"

To accomplish this, SunCo hired a self-professed witch, identified only as Raveena. "My family has known for years the secret of turning men into women," says Raveena, "but we've always used it mainly as a way to get revenge on cheating husbands and boyfriends. While we knew there were men who wanted this done to them, we always imagined the number to be so few that it wasn't worth trying to sell it."

As any shrewd businessperson knows, the secret to success lies in repeat business, and SunCo has planned for just that. Tans-former bikinis are being sold only at SunCo outlets, and will function only with SunCo lamps. But in addition, once the customer's tan fades, his male body will reappear. This will mean having to return to SunCo to maintain the new female form.
"They'll have to keep coming back," says Ternsville, "that's just how it works. Of course, having to wear the bikini while getting tanned will mean having tan-lines, but we think the customers will come to like that. Our motto for the product is, 'Show off who you are underneath,' which plays on both becoming a different person, and on having these tan-line. The tan-lines can actually be seen as a kind of 'meter' that lets the customer know when it's time to come back for another session."

SunCo hopes to begin marketing the Tans-former service sometime within the next six months.

Of course, I'll be showing you the advertisements as I create them. Here's the first:

Painted Toenails

2011-04-14T15:20:00.000-04:00

If you follow the news, you're probably aware of the J. Crew ad featuring a mom painting her son's toenails pink. If you haven't heard, here's a quick summary:

Conservative commentators: "This is an abomination!"
Everyone else: "LOL, STFU."

A more thorough exploration of the news can be seen here:

Femulate: Pink Toenails

And here's a picture of the offending ad:

Pictured here: the reason God will reign fiery vengeance upon our once-pious Nation.

As for my take on the topic, I believe that everyone is "burying the lead," so to speak. While debating whether or not painting a little boy's toenails pink can cause long-lasting damage to his psyche, commentators are ignoring the more important issue, which is: having your toenails painted pink is awesome.

If you're lucky, you'll find someone else who'll paint them for you. That's hot, as seen in the sexiest movie ever made, and the absolute only context in which sports are even slightly interesting, Bull Durham.

Fact: Sexiest Movie Ever.

Jon Stewart gets the final word on this subject:

The Daily Show - Toemageddon 2011 - This Little Piggy Went to Hell
Tags: Daily Show Full Episodes,Political Humor & Satire Blog,The Daily Show on Facebook

Less Cross, More Dreaming

2011-04-13T17:22:00.002-04:00

I'm going to say something that, to readers of this blog, may come as a shock. If given the opportunity to change into a woman, I wouldn't do it.

"Who do you think you're fooling?"

I'm not going to enumerate all the things that would suck about being a woman. I'm sure there's plenty of things that would be great about it, too. But, it's just always tempting to think the grass is greener on the other side of the fence.

Also, the girls are hotter.

I've noticed that discussions of crossdreaming tend to focus a lot on the "cross" and not so much on the "dreaming." That's interesting to me, because I find that my dreams about being a woman have much less impact on my life, than my habit of retreating to an imaginary world in the first place. I daydream all the time, and not only about being a woman. Once I'm done masturbating, I usually put my femenization fantasies away, and drag out a different daydream. For example, having an airship.

This airship is mine. You get your own.

Most crossdreamer or TG narratives begin with either, "I knew as a child that I was different," or the exact opposite, "I was pretty much normal as a child." I didn't have any gender confusion as a child, but I definitely knew from an early age that I wasn't like other kids. I was a dreamer, and most of them weren't.

In elementary school, "playing" meant wandering around the school yard in small packs pretending to be characters from our favorite cartoons. We'd have hit-and-run shoving matches with other packs of kids, who we pretended were the enemies of our characters.

I could do Soundwave's voice like you don't even know. They should have got me to be in those movies, except fuck them, because those movies sucked.

Sometime around 5th grade, though, that all went out the window. Recess was no longer about playing, and became about sports.

Relevant Image.

I never took an interest in sports. I wasn't smaller, or weaker, or slower than the other kids in my class, but for some reason, I could never quite wrap my mind around sports. Something about the overly-structured nature of it, the small window of what you were supposed to do and when you were supposed to do it, seemed detestable to me. This wasn't "recess" in any meaning of the word. To me, it just seemed like a continuation of what we did all day in class. It was no more fun than math or spelling. So I learned where the ball was least-likely to be, and that's where I stayed: off in my own dream world, only "playing" in the sense that I was technically on the field.

That was when it became apparent to other kids that I was different, although I knew even sooner. When I was 6 or 7 years old, I can remember helping my dad with some sort of outdoor project; something involving wood and dirt and hand-tools. I assessed what he was trying to accomplish, and came to the conclusion: what we need is a helicopter.

We could get some shit done around here if we had a helicopter.

But, I learned that we didn't have a helicopter, nor would we ever. We had wood and dirt and hand-tools. Where other little boys would probably have a grand time playing with wood and dirt and hand-tools, I just kind of sulked. My feeling was, "that's the best we can do?"

I felt disappointed. Not in my dad, but in reality. We all face that challenge, as kids, of separating what's real from what's make-believe. We all learn to stop believing in imaginary things like Santa Claus, ghosts, and democracy. Most kids just get over it...they say, "whatever" and move on to the next amusement they can find. But me, I've always been sort of heartbroken about it.. My view of the world is that, even at its very best, it's just a consolation prize. Everything there is to see and touch and do, will never be quite as good as what I can imagine. Like the wood and dirt and hand-tools, it's just "the best we can do."

So don't ask for my help with home-improvement projects until we have real functional lightsabers. Anything less would just be half-assing it.

Back in the early '90s, Saturday Night Live (which was the high-water mark for the show) had a segment called "Deep Thoughts with Jack Handey." This was my favorite quote from him:

"It's easy to sit there and say you'd like to have more money. And I guess that's what I like about it. It's easy. Just sitting there, rocking back and forth, wanting that money."

It's easy to fantasize about being a woman. But actually becoming one? Hell no.

Only 35 Years to Go!

2011-04-13T14:07:00.001-04:00

At some point, you have probably imagined a scenario like that in The Matrix, where you could download your consciousness into a computer simulator. And if you're visiting this blog, chances are you've imagined doing that so you could be a woman in an artificial reality. If you watched last night's episode of The Colbert Report, you heard his guest Ray Kurzweil say that it would be possible by the year 2045.

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Colbert actually asks if he could be a lady; I suspect if this technology becomes real, we'll probably see a lot of "digital cross-dressers" who are curious to try it.

This is very exciting news! It's all very speculative, of course, and it may not happen after all. But just thinking about it makes me feel hopeful. If this doesn't come to be, I will be very disappointed.

"I lived all these years for NOTHING!"

I've already started "shopping" through my porn files to find the women I want to use as avatars. No doubt, I'll probably end up with an massive list by the time 2045 comes around. I'm pretty sure that, like outfits, we'll have many that we keep around only for rare occasions, and some that we feel more comfortable wearing day-to-day. Although some of us, like Alexia, may have a particular form in mind that we like best.

Alexia is to Crossdreaming as AC/DC is to music: find what you like best, and stick with it.

Here's my first draft at a "wardrobe" that I'll be wearing in 2045:

Monday

Tuesday

Wednesday

Thursday

Friday

Saturday

Sunday

Holidays

Here's a recent Time Magazine article on Kurzweil:

http://www.time.com/time/health/article/0,8599,2048138-1,00.html

This Woman

2011-04-13T00:01:00.000-04:00

You may have seen images of this woman lying around the internet. Her image appears in advertisements posing as news with headlines like "ACAI BERRIES EXPOSED!" Undoubtedly, seeing this incredibly hot woman made you think, "maybe acai berries have the power to transform me into her." That's a perfectly reasonable assumption to make; after all, what would be the point in reporting on magic berries, if they couldn't turn you into a woman? That would make no sense whatsoever.

Unfortunately, acai berries don't actually do anything except cause gastric ulcers. [Edit: I can't actually verify whether acai berries do, or do not, cause gastric ulcers].

But apparently, she is an actual newscaster, and her name is Melissa Theuriau. Here's a You-tube clip of her.

Granted, she seems to speaking some sort of made-up language, perhaps that Elf-language from Lord of the Rings. Or, she may have some sort of neurological damage that impairs her ability to speak normally. In which case, you should feel ashamed of making fun of her. Nevertheless, it is undeniable that she is hot, and you wish you could be her. In fact, she's probably saying in that undecipherable tongue, "In other news, you wish you could be me, but you never, ever will. How unfortunate."

Here's a cool collage of her, where we can analyze which hairstyle and outfit we'd most like to sport if those damned acai berries didn't turn out to be a bunch of snake oil and fool's gold.

I especially like the second row down, third from the left: she's dressed kind of like a little kid, not at all typical of a newscaster. I imagine she's sitting Indian-style on the floor waiting to hear a story that teaches the value of honesty and the importance of learning fractions. Also, second row down, far right, it appears she's wearing a very low-cut kimono. Honestly, I would too. I'd be like, "I'm fucking hot, and I'm going to wear this low-cut kimono on the evening news. Deal with it."

Not such a good idea after all

2011-04-12T21:18:00.001-04:00

I like to look at porn on the internet. You may have heard of people doing that, or perhaps you haven't; it's a fairly obscure hobby. I particularly like photos of women sucking cock. I'll often save the photos I like best. In my recent browsing, I came across the following image, and decided to share it with you.

Now, in case you didn't notice, look at the photo from a different angle:

What the Hell? His dick has "Poison" tattooed on it. Just how is that a good idea, exactly?


Because it's tasty and irresistible?

In the first place, tattoos don't belong on your dick, I don't care how "edgy" and "hardcore" you profess to be. Secondly, poison--really? Really? Did he consider that most people's reaction to poison is, "don't get near it?"

To be fair, though, "Poison" is also synonymous with "Suck."

So I've taken a few more of my favorite cock-sucking pictures and altered them to feature a few more things that should not be tattooed on a dick.

Spring

2011-03-20T19:21:00.009-04:00

Happy St. Patrick's Day

2011-03-17T11:23:00.002-04:00

Here's a gift for all those cross-dressing Irish out there!

Fat Bottomed Girls

2011-03-09T23:15:00.005-05:00

Today, I want to express my appreciation for the fuller-figured girls. You've probably heard the joke, "How's a fat girl like a moped? They're fun to ride, but you wouldn't want your friends to see you."

There will come a day when you can only wish you had a fat girl to ride.

Well, I'll admit, I like a girl with some curves on her. I don't necessarily mean obese ladies, but girls with round, plump curves. Girls with soft, curvy bodies are fun.

Experts still debate whether or not they are also ticklish.

I've had the pleasure to know many sexy, curvy ladies, and it's a shame that most of them go through life hating themselves because they think of themselves as impossibly fat. They aren't, really, and we know that, but you can never convince them otherwise.

What I find really depressing is, they often reach this emotional place where they feel, since they can just never, ever be perfect, they might as well not even try anymore. Which is awful, because in a very short time, an extra 15 pounds turns into an extra 50. Then it's time to break out the sweatpants, cut your hair short, and throw the make-up away. It's tragic, really, because all I can think is, those big, round contours of yours were so awesome, and you threw them away because you didn't appreciate how incredibly sexy they were!

Fact: cock has fewer calories than ice cream.

I've decided that once I've completed my awesome Steampunk TG Raygun (and I promise, this will happen--right now I'm still on step 1: Learn "Science"), that it will absolutely have multiple settings. As promised, I will hunt you sexy bitches down, one by one. But now, you'll have to go through a 6-month orientation as a "curvy" girl. Of course, some of you will be absolutely thrilled with that, and won't care if you never get transformed again.

You'll easily lose weight by following this diet plan.

I've made another video for you, to honor all the awesome curvy girls out there:

http://www.4shared.com/video/wHSx8YxN/fatbottom.html

Panty Train!

2011-02-18T15:22:00.002-05:00

You're Welcome, Cracked.com!

2011-02-09T11:08:00.000-05:00

I'm a big fan of Cracked.com...if you've read it, and also read my blog, you've probably noticed how most of my recent posts mimic their style somewhat. I got a laugh from seeing how this morning's post mentioned some of the same things I talked about last month about Betty & Veronica.

http://www.cracked.com/article_19005_6-famous-artists-you-didnt-know-were-perverts.html

Now, I'm certainly not accusing them of stealing; our articles are much too different for that (mine's better). That, and I really doubt anyone there reads this blog. TG fantasy porn is a lot like Boo-Berry cereal: most people have never heard of it, those that have probably haven't tried it, and those that did probably didn't like it. But, somewhere out there, is someone whose favorite cereal is Boo-Berry, and they just can't start their day with anything else.

Oh, yeah. That's the stuff.

Curiously, they even used an image that I made a caption of, and posted on Rachel's Haven just last week.

Vickie's Safari Weekend

2011-02-07T18:47:00.000-05:00

As promised, anyone who capped me at Rachel's Haven this weekend got a return cap where I hunted them down with my awesome Steampunk TG ray gun. Here are the results!

Shinobu:

Ashley:

Meygan:

And Petra:

Now that I've developed a taste for hunting, I can't give it up! And, since so many girls were busy this weekend, with donation rewards, the February contest beginning, and this "Superbowl" thing I keep hearing about, I've decided to extend my hunt indefinitely. Whoever caps me, gets a one-time return cap where they're hunted down and zapped with my awesome Steampunk TG ray gun.

And if anyone would like to acquire a Steampunk sex toy of their very own, you can order one from this site:

Lady Clankington's Cabinet of Carnal Curiosities

I can't promise they'll have TG powers like mine does--it's one of a kind, don't you know--but I'm willing to bet you can still have lots and lots of fun with them!

More on TS vs. TG

2011-02-06T15:04:00.000-05:00

Just a quick addendum--how does your typical, "mainstream" vanilla outsider view transgenders and transexuals? This. Exactly This.

Which brings us, of course to this scene:

"Symbolic of his struggle against reality" hits home to me...probably will be expanding on that theme sometime this week.

Purple Girl: Please Marry Me

2011-02-04T19:32:00.000-05:00

The past few days, inspired by Jack Molay’s recent post at Crossdreamers, I’ve been exploring the conflict that has grown between transexuals and transgenders. I’ve been reading through several TS blogs, trying to wrap my head around how they feel, and through some crossdreamer blogs to see their responses.

From what I gather, transexuals don’t want to be associated with transgenders, or crossdreamers, or cross-dressers, or even with the LGBT community as a whole, because they feel that their own unique narratives are being drowned out. They don’t feel that they belong in the same box as us. While we like to imagine we have a pretty big umbrella, with plenty of room for lots of people under it, they prefer to insist that they simply shouldn’t get rained on.

And I’m not going to deny, that we are very different. Look at a TG blog, and you’ll see that our “inner women” are hyper-sexual nymphs, more cartoonish caricatures than actual women. Which, TS’s will say, proves that we’re just perverted sickos. Compared to our blogs, transexuals’ are often, well, dull. There are exceptions, of course--some of them are fun, exciting girls--but many of them have “inner women” that are frumpy, boring middle-aged cat ladies. Don’t get me wrong, I know more than a few frumpy, boring middle-aged cat ladies, and God bless ‘em, I love them. But, I just don’t always feel compelled to respond to their Facebook updates.

"I already sent you cabbages YESTERDAY, Ms. Doris!"

So, why the hell should we care, if they don‘t want to lumped together with us? Are we supposed to be upset, just because we invited them to our birthday party, and they said they’d rather stay home?

We wanted you see the pretty dress we had picked out.

Where the conflict really gets ugly is, getting to the heart of what causes this cross-dreaming/autogynephilia/transgender thing. In wanting to distance themselves from us, transexuals sometimes insist that our differences are of kind, not of degree. Which forces us to stare into the heart of darkness and ask ourselves, is this really just a fetish? Am I really just a shameful, frustrated pervert? Are any other attempts to explain it just rationalizing?

To be fair, they (the transexuals) aren’t all like that; in fact, most of them aren’t. Most of them seem like genuinely good people, and would probably be fun to have lunch and go shopping with. The most venomous, from what I’ve read, goes by the name Purple Girl. It was in responding to attacks from her blog that Molay brought up the TS-TG conflict. So, I read through some of her blog, and…wow. I have to say, it was actually pretty fun to read, in the same way that it must be fun for the writers of The Daily Show to watch Fox News. It’s hard to see in her writing just where the stupidity ends and the cruelty begins.

My first instinct was to repost some of her writing, and to channel my inner John Stewart (or Jane Stewart, if you will) with mocking reponses. Then I thought, “wouldn’t that just be stooping myself down to her level? Wouldn’t I be putting aside any dignity and credibility to do something like that?” The answer is, yes. But I’m going to do it anyway, because my inner women is also a bitch sometimes (and if you know her well enough, you’re allowed to address her as such). Because being a bitch is like masturbating: it’s fun, easy, and I’m pretty good at it.

Molay sez: "Vickie, you're not helping..."

Here are excerpts from Purple’s letter to the New York Times, which you can read in its entirety here (until she moves her URL, which apparently she sometimes does).

“Transgender is really an impossible word.”
Just like “Quetzalcoatl.” I use the word “transgender” whenever I play hang-man, and I win every god damn time. You do not want to play me in hang-man, because I will use the word “transgender.” And it’s impossible.

“Many men fantasize about being a girl because of sexist beliefs. They think women get a better shake in life, and they think women are only good for sex, and they want sex.”
"Real Women, like myself, can assure you than no woman in history has ever wanted sex."

“The truth is MtF transsexuals are really women inside in the core of the brain…”
"…Yes, the very CORE of the brain, where temperatures are known to reach as high as 3000 degrees Celsius, and pressures are so great that they could crush the Hope Diamond as though it were a Dixie Cup…”

“And most 'adult' publications have transgender models, but lie and call them transsexual models.”
A tradition that filthy pervert Hugh Hefner started in the very first issue of Playboy, when he intentionally mislabeled cross-dressing transgender Marilyn Monroe as transexual, because that was the only way anyone would want to look at pictures of her sweet, sweet tits.

“ Such lumping also damages our reputation and acceptance in the non-LGBT community of mainstream people where we belong.”
"I mean, it’s bad enough we have to share public water fountains with those people…"

“ It is defamation to include transsexuals with transgenders and other gender benders, and destroys their hard-earned place in the conventional, mainstream community which is so important to them.”
Actually, most hipsters will gladly tell you, transexuals were much better before they went mainstream. Not since the B-52’s released “Love Shack” has a previously-edgy band sold out to crass commercialism faster than when the transexuals decided to go mainstream.

And now, your Moment of Zen.

I could do this all day. I know, because it’s what I did all day yesterday. Now, if TS’s don’t want to come to our party, like I said, I don’t really care (although, the offer for lunch and shopping, is still on the table). My problem is when, in order to differentiate themselves from us, they seek to classify us as “sick.” Their condition is supposed to be viewed as somehow “legitimate” and “valid,” while ours is something despicable.

And, to be fair, we fall right into their hands. I see a lot of TG’s talk about suffering from depression. Self-hatred appears to be a major part of what drives this fetish. I know that I’ve always had overactive sense of shame, and I suspect it’s pretty common amongst us. It’s not hard to go from having feelings of being “strange and different,” to “fucked up and wrong.”

A few years ago, I came out of a relationship with a woman who had a few kids. My mom said to me at the time, “You can’t raise someone else’s kids, because they’re not your kind of crazy.”

Now, I disagree that you can never have effective step-parenting or foster-parenting; I think she was wrong on that. But, I like that at the heart of that sentiment, is the assumption that we’re all “crazy.” It’s not a question of whether you’re crazy or not, it’s simply a question of how.

Don’t get hung up on whether you have something wrong with you that requires you to be labeled, and that it’s listed in the DSM. I work in the medical field, and I’ve seen crazy. Real Bat-shit crazy.
I’ve seen people with drug addictions so bad that they have to be snatched-back from the jaws of death because they’ve overdosed--only to have them do it again a few months later. Some people OD with the frequency that other people get their oil changed.
I’ve seen people that have emotional breakdowns in a supermarket, because they are absolutely convinced that if they pick up the wrong box of Pop-Tarts, it will cause an explosion somewhere that will kill people.
Hallucinations of snakes, spiders, and bugs crawling all over you? It’s not just Hollywood; I’ve seen people having that.
There’s a condition called pica in which people will compulsively eat things that aren’t edible. Some will eat fingernails and dirt. Some of those fuckers will eat paperclips if you don’t keep an eye on them.
You don’t have problems. Those people have problems.

So, if your problem is that you fantasize about being a woman--and you love porn maybe a little too much--and maybe you like to slip into some sexy heels every now and then: stop worrying about whether or not you’re crazy. Of course you’re crazy. But, that’s just your kind of crazy, and it’s a pretty awesome kind, if you ask me.

The Hunt is On!

2011-02-03T21:45:00.000-05:00

Ashley at Rachel's Haven made this great cap for me:

Everyone fell in love with the idea of getting zapped with a TG ray gun...especially a cool Steampunk TG ray gun!

I made the threat that if I ever got my hands on one of those, I was going to hunt those girls down like Uma Thurman did the Deadly Viper Assassin Squad in Kill Bill. Well, I'm announcing that Vickie's awesome steampunk TG ray gun is locked and loaded, and I'm making my list of who's getting zapped! I pledge that any of the Rachel's Haven girls who make me a caption over this weekend will get a return caption where they get hunted down like they deserve!

Click here to hear the '80s music. You know you want to.

True Story

2011-02-03T14:12:00.002-05:00

More Caps!

2011-02-02T09:20:00.000-05:00

I've been a busy girl lately, making lots of captions for the ladies over at Rachel's Haven. Since it's possible that not everyone visits there (and if you don't, shame on you!), I'll share them here, too.

For Caitlyn:

For Rachel herself, becoming a man:

For Bren:

For Mei:

For Ashley:

For Shauna Marie:

For Steffie:

And finally, two for Simone:

The Rubicon

2011-01-31T12:21:00.001-05:00

Last week, I decided that the time had come to finally own up to this thing. You know what thing I'm talking about--this whole cross-dreaming, autogynephilia thing. I was spending more and more time thinking about it, and after more than twenty years, I had to admit it was part of me and wasn't going away. I thought to myself, if I were gay, would I treat it like a shameful secret that I kept hidden away, or would I admit it? It was time for me to "come out."

Don't act so surprised, bitch.

Which may be stepping on the toes of any homosexuals out there. I can imagine one saying, "what you have is a fetish, not a variant sexual orientation. There's a big difference between what turns you on, and living a completely different lifestyle."

I would happily embrace this lifestyle.

And, on some level, they're right: it is like a fetish, in that I'm not wandering around the office telling everybody I see, because, weird. But, in some ways, it really is a sexual orientation. When I decided it was time to "come out," I didn't have a wife or girlfriend to tell. And why not? I'm attracted to women. I understand women well enough to tell when they're attracted to me. But, I'm single, and have been for a long time, and probably always will be.

Of course, a girl can have plenty of fun all by herself.

And that's why this counts as a separate sexual orientation: the part of me that interacts with others on a sexual level, is female. I want to play the female role--the object of desire, the one who gets pursued. And, that's a pretty tough role for a man to play. I see a lot of women throwing me their nonverbal "chase me!" signals, and I just look the other way. There was a time when I could keep up the charade for a few weeks or months, but eventually I'd become sullen and resentful that I had to play the role of the "pursuer." So, I stopped bothering.

Chase your own damn self; I'm going home to look at porn.

So, I decided to "come out" to a young couple I've known for a few years. I understood them to be hip and smart, and expected them to be understanding and non-judgmental. And, they were. In fact, the wife told me that she'd had similar transgender fantasies, and that she sometimes thought of herself as a gay man in a woman's body. I thought that was pretty awesome, and since I never see any female-to-male captions, I decided to make one for her.

(She never really told me what she thought of it; I guess it's true what they say: Men are from Venus, Women are from Mars.)

Completely Ass-backwards.

Talking about it was very liberating for me. I think I've always regarded this part of myself as something shameful. And, I've always dealt with it by drawing imaginary lines in the sand and saying to myself, "as long as I don't cross this line, I'm okay with it." Admitting to it, out loud, was one of those lines. Once I'd crossed that threshold, I realized I was the only one putting those borders there, no one else. And furthermore, I should be okay with it, regardless.

Was blind, but now I see.

With those imaginary lines in the sand cleared away, I decided it was time to go another step with it. It was time to go from cross-dreaming, to cross-dressing. So, I bought some panties--pink, of course--and I'm wearing them. And yes, it's awesome.

Warning: Results Shown Not Typical.

So, where does it go from here? Do I go for a whole en femme ensemble? Maybe. Of course, I've never applied make-up before, so there's no telling how that will go.

Just let me paint you that picture...

I'm flirting with the idea of just wearing women's underwear from now on. That's very sexy, in a frisky, naughty kind of way. Except, I have to admit, they're not as comfortable as I'd imagined.

Comfort is probably not what the designers had in mind, though.

Nevertheless, I've crossed the Rubicon, and can't uncross it.

Pretty much says it all.

The Afterlife

2011-01-31T07:05:00.003-05:00

When I was 11 or 12 years old, and I'd go to bed for the night, I'd lay there in the dark and fantasize about two things: being transformed into a woman, and going to Hell.

I'm not just going to Hell--I'm driving the bus.

Even though I grew up in a Christian family in a Christian community, right here in the Bible Belt, I never really believed in God. I think Faith is a lot like sexual orientation, in that you're simply born with what you have, and you might learn to keep it to yourself or just play along with what's expected of you. Or, if you're free to, you'll develop into what your natural temperament allows, which for me, happens to be Agnostic. I didn't choose to be Agnostic; that's just how I am.

I prefer choices that are "win-win."

I discovered my innate agnosticism right around the time I discovered that masturbating was fun, and that masturbating while imagining I'm being transformed into a woman against my will is fun multiplied times itself.

Masturbating while imagining you've gone to Hell, as punishment for your bizarre fantasies, where devil-women transform you into one of them so that you can tempt others into having more of those bizarre fantasies, is like the calculus of fun.

Now, even though I had figured out that I didn't believe in God, I was no means certain about it. I mean, what if I was wrong?

Just because they were wrong about evolution, economics, politics, black people, and pretty much everything else they'd ever told me, doesn't mean they were wrong about Jesus.

If I was wrong, it meant that I was going to Hell. And while I knew I would never meet a witch, or a genie, or aliens, or whatever else I imagined causing me to change gender, I knew that if I went to Hell, it could seriously, actually happen. In fact, I was pretty sure that was exactly what would happen, because that's what it says in the Bible. Somewhere. Probably. Hell, I don't know, I never read it.


I always stopped reading when I got to this part, because that's where I always cum. I mean, Eve is fucking hot, am I right? She's history's first MILF.

Now, you're probably thinking to yourself, "how is that Hell, if becoming a woman is what you want to happen? That sounds more like a reward than a punishment." And, you'd be right, except that for the first few years, I never admitted to myself that gender transformation was something I wanted to happen. For years, it was always something that was forced upon me in a way that I was powerless to resist. It's all part of a greater masochism.

These days, there's just not as much "resisting" as there used to be. Now, hurry up, She-devil! Debauchery awaits!

I no longer think of myself as 'agnostic', the same way I no longer think of myself as 'straight'. I approach my spirituality the same way I approach my sexuality: full of strange visions that would make most people uncomfortable, and that defy easy classification. Heaven and Hell are just a childish way of viewing the world beyond the veil, just as Masculine and Feminine are a childish way of viewing sex.

Be who you really are, and trust that everything will work out right.

Vegas in Space

2011-01-27T14:21:00.003-05:00

I've just discovered this movie Vegas in Space. For those who've never heard of it, it's a Sci-Fi B-Movie from the early '90s in which space explorers have to take sex-change pills to visit the all-girl planet of Clitoris to recover some stolen "Girlinium." That's the whole plot.

The cast is almost entirely drag queens. It's takes campy and kitschy to new levels; it's like if John Waters was possessed by the ghost of Ed Wood and decided to remake Star Trek. It makes Barbarella look like Blade Runner, while the special effects make the original Dr. Who look like Avatar. It's almost impossible to watch without imagining the robots from Mystery Science Theatre 3000 sitting beside you making jokes about it. It's not ashamed to self-consciously make fun of itself, while also possessing moments of pure genius that you can't help but feel are better than it deserves.


In other words: It's pretty much the best thing in the whole history of ever.

Here's the trailer.

And yes, you can watch the whole thing online via Netflix!

Freaky Ghost Eyes

2011-01-24T01:37:00.000-05:00

I found this picture while looking for photos of Goth girls.

Recent Captions

2011-01-23T10:13:00.000-05:00

Here are some TG captions I made for some of the girls over at Rachel's Haven.

This one is for Simone:

This one is for Dementia:

And this one is for Petra:

Sweet Dreams are Made of This

2011-01-21T13:35:00.001-05:00

Who am I to Disagree?

I've always had a fascination with dreams. Some of my earliest memories are of things I dreamed when I was a child. I've made dreams a theme of some captions. And when I started this blog, the title "Lady in my Dreams" just seemed natural.

Lately, I've been thinking more and more about Lucid Dreaming, which you've likely heard of before. We've all had lucid dreams at some time or another: somehow, you realize you're dreaming, and you take control and make things go your way. But, there are those who practice reaching this state frequently. They develop dreaming like a skill, until they're able to reach lucidity more often, have improved vividness, and exert more control. I've flirted with the idea off and on for years now, thinking I could really get into this. But, I've always thrown "lucid dreaming" in the same pile as "start jogging" and "stop having weird perverted fantasies": probably a good idea, but sounds like it'd be too much effort.

But I've just had the epiphany: "What if I combined lucid dreaming with my TG fantasies?" It seems like such an obvious combination, that I felt embarrassed that I'd not thought of it before. It was definitely this kind of moment:

So I've made up my mind to take up Lucid Dreaming as a project. I'm going to treat it like a kind of hobby: something I enjoy doing and can work at to get better. I've found an online forum where I can learn more. If you're curious, here's a link:
http://www.dreamviews.com/content/

My ultimate goal, as you might imagine, is to be able to live out as many TG fantasies as I please. Like many of you, I love having these fantasies, and would love to experience them, but I'm not going to have SRS or take up crossdressing. Having a vivid, memorable dream seems like the closest I'll ever be able to get. Now, you may be wondering, is any of this going to work? And my answer is, I have no fucking clue. For all I know, this could all be New Age chicanery. I'm not making any promises except that I'm going to make a sincere attempt, and I'll tell you if it works, or if it doesn't.

That is, assuming I ever get out of bed again, which I may not.

Keeping a dream journal is the first step. Every day, upon waking, try to remember as much as you can about your dreams. Then, write it down. This is supposed to improve dream recall, and to help you recognize when you're dreaming. You should do this every day.


You can bet your sweet ass I chose the girliest-looking dream journal I could find.

One thing I'm not going to subject you to, is posting my dream journal here. I think it was Joseph Campbell who said something like, "there's nothing we find more fascinating than our own dreams, and nothing less interesting than hearing about the dreams of others."

Nobody wants to hear about the time you had lunch with Paul McCartney and Saddam Hussein, because it didn't fucking happen.

I'll be giving you regular updates on my progress (or lack thereof), though. It's my hope that this idea bears fruit and can be a useful tool for crossdreamers (a name that seems all the more appropriate now, doesn't it?).

Sweet Dreams are Made of This

BOOBS!

2011-01-18T06:29:00.002-05:00

Quick, what's the first thing you think of when you see this?

I'll give you a hint: this post is titled "BOOBS!"

If you answered "fast food," "burgers," "fries," or something along those lines, you're only half right. (If you answered "Mickey D's," then you are a douchebag, and need to stop using the term "Mickey D's.")

Every time someone uses the phrase "Mickey D's," God transforms a lingerie model into an internet weirdo. That's the very opposite of what we're trying to accomplish here, people!

According to Eric Schlosser, author of Fast Food Nation, you're also supposed to think of breasts. Schlosser describes how the company intentionally wanted their logo to have "great Freudian importance in the subconscious minds of consumers" (p. 98). The Golden Arches' resemblance to tits is supposed to instill customers with feelings of comfort, nourishment, and safety.

Which brings me to the topic of today's post: I really love boobs.


Pictured here: comfort, nourishment, and safety.

I love them, and that's completely natural. After all, I adore hot, sexy women, as a normal guy does. But, because of some strange cross-wiring of my empathy and objectification faculties, I get off on fantasizing about becoming the kind of woman I'm attracted to. It could be worse, I suppose.

But getting back to topic: boobs are awesome. I want to have them.

Remember to mention how grateful you are when Thanksgiving comes around.

Now, I'm not talking about the furry man-boobs I get from driving past the gym on my way to McDonald's. No, I want round, wonderful TITS. I want magnificent, head-turning cleavage and large, girlish nipples.

Like everyone else, I really just want to fit in.

Some men will say they appreciate a small-breasted woman; and I answer, so do I! In the same way I appreciate a fresh garden salad. Sure, it's delicious, but most of the time I'd rather have a Big Mac.

I'll have what she's having.

Is there such a thing as too big? God, yes. After a certain point, having bigger boobs just makes you grotesque. However, there's still a tremendous appeal to having grotesquely large breasts. And men who say they're not attracted to big breasts are lying liars who tell lies.

Too much of a good thing is marvelous! Grotesque, yes, but marvelous none the less!

It should come as no surprise that there are many breast-enlarging products available, like herbal supplements and such. Supposedly, there's a subliminal recording that has shown to be successful...I can't attest to whether it really works or not. I am really fond of this recording, though.

http://adult.hypnoticwishes.com/sound/IMustIncreaseMyBust.mp3

For lots of fun, you can use a program like Windows Movie Maker to pair video clips of well-endowed girls to that soundtrack. Then you can imagine you're being brainwashed into growing big girlish titties.


You can thank me when you end up looking like this.

Somebody is liable to point out the drawbacks of big boobs, the most common one being that it leads to having chronic back pain. My response to that is, shut up and get the Hell out of my weird perverted fantasy. I'm well-aware that there's all kinds of practical considerations to think about. I did a post about that way back here [LINK]. Complaining about big boobs causing back pain, in the context of a TG fantasy blog, is like those dickheads who complain about X-Wings not really needing wings because they're in space.


I stopped reading once she started peppering her posts with lame Star Wars references.

Another common complaint is, big-breasted women are immediately thought of as brainless bimbos who aren't to be taken seriously. To which I say: Yes! Now you're really getting it!


Pictured here: a brainless bimbo not to be taken seriously.

Whenever the occasion calls for a moment of silence, and everyone is asked to bow their heads and be reverent, I have a prayer that I recite. Silently, of course. You don't want to be saying this shit out loud in public.

Dear Lord, please turn me into a hot, sexy woman. However you want to go about it is fine. You can send a genie or a witch or whatever. Just please, do it soon. And please, give me some great tits. Being flat-chested would suck, but I guess it would still be an improvement. But, if it's not too much trouble, please remember to include big boobs.

Amen.

Betty and Veronica

2011-01-16T10:13:00.004-05:00

I used to read comics when I was kid. In fact, I mentioned way back here [LINK] how comics first planted the seeds of TG fantasy in my adolescent mind. But while I enjoyed titles like The Uncanny X-MEN and The Avengers, I had a secret love affair with Archie comics. Or specifically, with Archie's girlfriends, Betty and Veronica. (And Jughead--I've always liked Jughead).

Note: If a comic actually says "collectors edition" on the cover, chances are it won't be worth anything.

The classic "Archies" style was created by illustrator Dan DeCarlo when he worked for the publisher in the '50s and '60s. Since then, Betty and Veronica have become easily recognizable pop culture icons.

DeCarlo was also known to sully the wholesome characters with pornographic perversions. How dare he!

A few years ago, the publishers decided to "update" the characters' appearance, hoping to appeal to a more modern audience. That strategy almost never works. In a few months, they had returned to the classic DeCarlo style.

WTF? Who the Hell are these Harpies?

Betty and Veronica intentionally represent two different archetypes. Betty is the "girl next door": down-to-earth, modest, and accessible. She's easy for readers to identify with, and has a come-as-you-are appeal.

It's easy to identify with Betty: she loves dick just like you do!

Veronica, on the other hand, is the "glamor girl" : wealthy, privileged, and sophisticated. Veronica represents the unobtainable, status-conscious tease.

Veronica sets high standards everyone should strive for!

For decades, Archie (and through him, the reader) has had to face the "Betty-Veronica Dilemma": which one do you choose? Would it be "settling" to go with Betty? As gorgeous as Betty is, she's just not as exciting as Veronica. But, if he picks Veronica, would he grow weary of trying to live up to her standards of glamor, excitement, and sophistication? Would he be "selling out" and try to be someone he's not just to appease her?

Some people think of the "Betty-Veronica Dilemma" as the "Ginger-Mary Ann Dilemma." Those people should be avoided.

Of course, in everyone's mind (including DeCarlo's, if the previous picture is any indication) the couple we really wanted to see hook up was Betty and Veronica. I mean, what's so attractive about Archie, anyway?

Veronica seems shocked, but Betty is all into it, proving once again that good girls are usually freaky.

So the question for you is, are you a Betty, or a Veronica? Who do you most identify with, and wish you could be?

Whichever one you choose, you still get to make out with the other one. So, you can't lose, really.

No Jack, Just Jills

2011-01-13T20:41:00.000-05:00

Renewed for Another Season!

2011-01-11T04:04:00.000-05:00

Well, I promised I'd soon get back to regular posting, and here we are! A few weeks ago, I said I was feeling burned out, and it turns out I just needed to take a little break. At the time, I felt like I'd run completely out of things to talk about. But, after a few weeks of skimming the internet, saving lots of sexy pictures to my 'blog' file, I feel renewed and ready to go on posting.

Some people start the day reading the news; I start the day reading porn.

Blogging about my fantasies just feels wonderful. It's really a tremendous turn-on to publicly admit that I have these strange secret thoughts. It has a thrill of exhibitionism to it.

It's not enough just to wish you were this woman. It doesn't really count unless you announce it on the internet.

Awhile back, I had disabled the comments on here because I felt that I was allowing my desire for feedback to influence my posts. That turned out to be a mistake, I think. I should welcome feedback, because it lets me know how I'm not alone in having these kinds of fantasies. Validation is a wonderful thing!

Before the internet, crossdreamers just didn't get much validation.

So, you can look forward to seeing regular posts once again. And, you'll notice the comment section is active, so feel free to leave some--girls need lots of compliments!

"And you bitches better have some nice things to say!"

Winter Blues

2011-01-06T04:17:00.000-05:00

Hi there girls! I've decided to stop by and make a new post for you. This blog is still "on hiatus" for now, but I plan to get back to regular posting soon enough.

I know how those cold, dark winter months can really get you down. Now, I'm all for cozying up by the fireplace, but having to slog through the ice and snow is not my idea of fun.

Also not fun: watermarks. Seriously, watermarks are tacky, and need to go away.

So, to help you get through this dreadful, dismal time of year, just imagine yourself doing this:

In this picture: you!

Yes, ladies, this is you! While right now, you may be standing in the icy wind, getting soaked by freezing rain while waiting for that bus to come along, in just a few months, this will be you. Imagine a warm June day, the smell of freshly cut grass, sunshine on your bare body, soft breezes blowing through your hair. This will be you--you in the swing, you in the stockings, you in the heels.

So, hang in there, ladies...spring will be here before you know it!

Hiatus

2010-12-10T04:52:00.000-05:00

I'm going to take a break from blogging for a little while. You might say I've already begun, because the last month or so I've just been slowly publishing stuff I made a long time back. The whole "Pussy" series was completed back in September, I've just had them pre-scheduled to post ever since then. The truth is, I'm kind of burned out. I started this blog as a place mostly for commentary, but over time it morphed into just another tg caption blog. Perhaps in a few weeks or months I'll start posting again, but for now, I'm on hiatus.

An Attempt at Photocomics

2010-12-07T04:13:00.000-05:00

This is my first attempt at making a TG photo comic. I don't know if I can make many of these, though...it's hard to find photos that go together just right. Brazzers.com has lots of photofiles for downloading, but they all follow pretty much the same narrative, and the people tend to make the same facial expressions over and over again.

And I realize it's too small to read as it is. You'll want to click on it to zoom in as much as you can.

Follow CDC Guidelines

2010-12-05T02:29:00.000-05:00

Whose idea was it to put the fax machine way the Hell up there on top of the bookshelf?

Brutal Chances

2010-12-03T04:21:00.000-05:00

Other Transformations

2010-12-01T21:06:00.000-05:00

I've noticed while looking for TG art, that some people fantasize about transformations other than Male-to-Female. Other than the Furries, which I don't even know how to approach, I can appreciate some of this TF art. For one, it involves being degraded and a loss of self, which is often (though not for everyone) part of the appeal of gender transformation. Secondly, the transformations can be forced upon you by an attractive, dominant woman, which I'm totally on-board with. So, any readers who are also fans of that sort of thing, I've taken a few images and shaped them into fantasies about being transformed into something that's not a woman.

Underwear/Lingerie is very popular:

Here's one about a turtle*:
*You could argue that this is technically "Furry," but I will say a) turtles aren't furry in any way, and b) it's the anthropomorphic stuff that I don't entirely care for.

Lastly, one I like about spectacles:

Vickie is a Pussy

2010-11-27T02:15:00.000-05:00

This is the last of this series, and I since I've already picked on Alexia I thought it was only fair to poke fun at myself, too.

Pussy #16

2010-11-25T02:14:00.000-05:00

Pussy #15

2010-11-23T02:12:00.000-05:00

Pussy #14

2010-11-21T02:10:00.000-05:00

Pussy #13

2010-11-19T00:44:00.000-05:00

Pussy #12

2010-11-17T00:31:00.000-05:00

Pussy #11

2010-11-15T00:29:00.000-05:00

Pussy #10

2010-11-13T00:28:00.000-05:00

Pussy #9

2010-11-11T11:23:00.000-05:00

The End

2010-11-09T11:38:00.000-05:00

Pussy #8

2010-11-07T11:22:00.000-05:00

Nymph

2010-11-05T11:20:00.000-04:00

In the News

2010-11-04T19:51:00.004-04:00

There's a blogger getting a lot of attention out there because she let her son dress as Daphne (from Scooby Doo) for Halloween.

http://nerdyapplebottom.com/2010/11/02/my-son-is-gay/

To which I say, who wouldn't want to be Daphne? Daphne is fucking awesome!

I might have to dress up like Daphne, too. Not waiting for next Halloween, though.

Pussy #7

2010-11-02T14:41:00.000-04:00

This week's Ad is especially for Alexia.

Attack of the Werewomen!

2010-10-31T02:58:00.001-04:00

Happy Halloween, ladies! To celebrate the holiday, I'm dedicating this post to the Werewoman (sometimes called a WereWif), an idea I'm sure you'd enjoy. There is a blog completely about them here {link}, though it doesn't seem very active. The concept is pretty self-explanatory: during the full moon, a man who has the curse (or blessing, from my point of view) becomes a woman. I'm going to try to expand the werewif mythos with a few captions of my own. Enjoy!

May Queen

2010-10-29T11:13:00.000-04:00

Pussy #6

2010-10-27T13:20:00.000-04:00

Body Suit Ad

2010-10-26T21:01:00.001-04:00

I just ran across this ad online, and I LOL'd. If only it really meant what I'd like it to mean!

The Vain Prince

2010-10-25T10:49:00.000-04:00

Pussy #5

2010-10-23T13:19:00.000-04:00

The Red Room

2010-10-21T10:40:00.000-04:00

Pussy #4

2010-10-19T13:17:00.000-04:00

The Devil and Adam Williamson

2010-10-17T11:03:00.000-04:00

Pussy #3

2010-10-15T13:16:00.000-04:00

Jacques and the Goblins

2010-10-13T10:37:00.000-04:00

Some Changes

2010-10-12T10:05:00.002-04:00

I've always felt a little disappointed when I don't get as many comments as I'd hoped for. Of course, I visit lots of other blogs, and only rarely leave a comment myself, even if I really like something. But, it is really nice when people compliment your work. Even more than that, it's great to have people say that they, too, have had feelings and experiences that you've shared; that kind of validation is one of the reasons to get into blogging.

About a week ago, I formatted the blog so that people could click to check that they like something, or click to say they didn't care for it. I noticed that on some of my recent posts, someone did in fact check off that they didn't care for them. Which made me question, if you don't care for it, why are you looking at my blog? But, an even better question was, why the Hell should I care, if someone doesn't like it?

That's what made me realize how I'd come to let viewer feedback influence the content. Blogging had become a kind of entertainment work that I did, and praise was how I got paid. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate every nice thing that's been said, and every post I've made has been something I've enjoyed making.

I'm going to continue to make new posts. But, there'll be no feedback. There's no space for comments, no boxes to check, no hit-counter, and no more list of followers. What's changing is, I'm no longer doing this for validation, of any kind.

Femmetech + Disney

2010-10-12T04:19:00.003-04:00

It may be shameless, but if there's money to be made in this racket, you can be sure they'll try to get in on it.

Pussy #2

2010-10-11T08:25:00.000-04:00

The Ogre King's Bride

2010-10-09T08:39:00.000-04:00

For JamieLin

2010-10-07T00:33:00.003-04:00

I found this photo just the other day, and it made me think of JamieLin. We're going to miss her.

A New Advertising Series

2010-10-05T06:25:00.000-04:00

I've created another series of TG Ads, similar to COCKSUCKERtm and FEMMETECHtm. This series is for PUSSYtm. The target demographic is for the "lesser-than" man. Not "lesser-than" in the same sense as FEMMETECHtm (at least, not always in that sense), but "lesser-than" in the sense of timid, submissive, sensitive, self-conscious, anxious, imaginative...all those lacking in the aggresion, competitiveness, physicality, boldness, and risk-taking associated with manliness. In other words, it's for pussies. It helps them to realize their true nature, to self-actualize. They can finally become in a concrete and material sense what they've always been figuratively. It's a good thing; they'll be much happier that way. I myself am a pussy--I'm timid, submissive, sensitive, self-conscious, anxious, and imaginative--and I'd love it if there were such a company as this. Because as much as nobody likes a "pussy"...everybody loves some pussy:)

Beautiful Stories for Ugly Children

2010-10-02T10:35:00.003-04:00

I'm starting a new series for you. These are TG captions based on folk tales (something I've always loved). Not necessarily any real folk tales, though. Some of them make reference to stories you've heard elsewhere, but most of them are just emulating the style and tone. I don't present the whole story, because I really don't need to. The formula for those stories is pretty familiar to everyone. I'm just presenting excerpts, the parts that are most exciting, or sexy, or funny. Here's the first one:

Femmetech #6

2010-09-30T09:41:00.001-04:00

You Know You Are

2010-09-28T19:51:00.002-04:00

I've had this photo for awhile now, stashed away in my file of "things that may end up on the blog." I just never could decide what exactly to do with it. Then suddenly, while assembling photos for another topic I was working on, I looked at this photo and that caption just sprang forth into my mind. I thought it was just the perfect sentiment for an audience of men who desperately wish they could become this woman. I know I risk sounding a little too proud of my work, but I enjoy this one a little more than most.

Vickie the Cocksucker

2010-09-28T06:31:00.003-04:00

I thought we'd revisit an older theme once more before moving on to some of the new stuff I'm crafting. This time, yours truly steps into the advertisement.

Femmetech #5

2010-09-27T09:09:00.001-04:00

Pisces

2010-09-25T12:02:00.002-04:00

Well, we finally have the last of this series. I didn't enjoy it as much as I thought I would, and it certainly didn't get as much feedback as other posts. But, once I started it, I felt like it needed to be seen through to the end. I did like the images, though. The body painting was cool.

Another Flash animation

2010-09-23T09:13:00.002-04:00

Here's another Flash animation I like. This one is a straightforward TG sequence.

Infinity's TG Comics [Link]

Autumn

2010-09-21T00:41:00.000-04:00

Aquarius

2010-09-18T11:46:00.000-04:00

O(+>

2010-09-16T00:40:00.010-04:00

A long while back, I talked about singer Debbie Harry and her ensemble, Blondie. Today I'm going to talk about another artist whose music turns me on: Prince. This won't be a pop-music history lesson; if you don't know who Prince is, you can read up on him elsewhere. This is about my psycho-sexual reaction to him.

First, we'll make it clear: I'm a guy, and I like guy music. Led Zeppelin. AC/DC. The Who. But, I've got an undeniably female persona, an inner woman, and she likes Prince. But, it's not just that she grooves to him on her pink iPod when she's down at the gym--it's much more than that. Prince gets my inner woman hot.

Now, if you're wondering why, you're probably a) not alone, and b) another typical guy who's clueless about what women really want. Prince clearly doesn't fit the image of the alpha male. Firstly, he's about 3 feet tall; if he'd been born a few decades earlier, he could have auditioned to be part of the Lollipop Guild. Second, he's effeminate. He looks like Halle Berry if she'd taken just enough male hormones to grow a five o'clock shadow. Third, he doesn't hide that he's sensitive, perhaps oversensitive. Maybe even obnoxiously sensitive. Prince was "emo" before emo was an insult.

Prince's sex appeal comes from two interconnected aspects. First, his music is about sex--dirty, filthy sex. But, it's dirty, filthy sexy music for women. This isn't the "sex the way a man wants it" of rock 'n roll, or the "sex as part of a romance narrative" of pop music. This is the soundtrack to women's sexual desires. Prince addresses the part of women that, previously, had been covered over by centuries of cultural taboo.

Second, Prince embodies the trope that women are attracted to confidence. He presents himself as though he were a sex god, as if no one had told him he was a short, effeminate sissy. He doesn't doubt his sexual power, and it doesn't occur to him that anyone would. Prince presents himself as if he could have any woman he wanted...and women seem to agree.

http://www.4shared.com/video/VEG-zEWG/Vickies_Prince.html

I've created a short video with a medley of his songs imposed over some sexy images. Here's a link to it above. Try to check it out soon; it'll likely get removed for either obscenity or copyright infringement. Also, for those concerned about internet security, I embedded it with a Trojan that forwards your personal information to FEMMETECH, who will send an extraction team to kidnap and feminize anyone who downloads it. Enjoy!

Animated Dream Sequence

2010-09-14T15:45:00.000-04:00

Here's a Flash Animation I found that shows what I think is a wonderful Dream Sequence.

What women want

Capricorn

2010-09-11T08:00:00.000-04:00

Another Quiz!

2010-09-08T17:40:00.001-04:00

Time for another quiz! As usual, the password is femme

Who Will Transform You into a Woman? » make online tests

By Request

2010-09-08T09:00:00.003-04:00

This series is inspired by a request from Vancouverite over at Rachel's Haven.

Femmetech #4

2010-09-07T06:34:00.002-04:00

Sagittarius

2010-09-04T11:07:00.000-04:00

Femmetech #3

2010-08-31T06:33:00.003-04:00

Scorpio

2010-08-28T10:50:00.000-04:00

Heart

2010-08-26T13:46:00.000-04:00

Previously, I've talked about how chocolate or tramp-stamps can be catalysts for causing physical sex transformations. Another similar entry would be trimming your pubic hair into the shape of a heart. It's a very sexy, very feminine thing to do; most men wouldn't do it. Maybe you'd do it willingly to yourself, or you could be restrained and have it done to you. Or, like the lady in this first caption, maybe you were duped into it.

That one seems very excited about her new female role...I'm guessing she did it willingly.

The problem with this particular fantasy is, trimming your pubes into a heart doesn't exactly work on guys because the genitals get in the way. You can probably get the top part okay, but the pointy part at the bottom either gets cut off, or you have to make a much smaller heart from the hair growing superior to the penis. In that case, you just have to imagine it grows into the correct proportion as the rest of you transforms.

Lifted from 2 different corners of the web, but obviously from the same photoshoot. Isn't that gorgeous? How much girlier can you get?

This last image is actually a link to a cool flash animation. Click it!

Femmetech #2

2010-08-24T06:32:00.003-04:00

I really love that look on her face...such a turn-on. I also love the name "Altoona, PA." Never been there, though.

Libra

2010-08-21T05:01:00.000-04:00

Size Matters

2010-08-17T05:41:00.003-04:00

I'm going to start this post with some shameless flattery...one of my favorite blogs out there belongs to Jamielin. I adore her very cool retro style and her very candid confessions, and if I could have my way, I'd love to have some awesome girl-on-girl playtime with her...

The real reason I'm mentioning her now, though, is because I was reading through her old posts and found that she'd hit on something that I'd been thinking about, too. [Here's a Link] Specifically, it has to do with cock size as it pertains to the Agp community. I, too, had wondered if this was a community of teeny-tiny guys who were riddled with feelings of not "measuring up."

While Jamielin admits to being "gifted," for most of my life I thought I was somewhat on the small side. I'd read in several places about what the average size is (today there's even a wiki page on it, but in my youth we didn't have fancy-shmancy internetz to learn these things), and so I knew on some level that what I thought wasn't true. But still, I knew in my heart that I was just less than what a man should be. It's very possible that pornography could have distorted my perception of what "average" is, but I think there's something more to it.

Fast forward to today, and I can say, I've seen a lot of naked men. Not model and porn star men, but, ordinary real-world people. I've seen some big ones, and I've seen some small ones, but those a few and far between; for the most part, most men fall within the range of "average." I realize now that there's no reason for me to feel inadequate...but I still do.

There's no denying that size is equated with masculinity. But, I now believe that for some (myself included) a feeling of inadequacy can precede and then effect the perception of size. If you don't perceive yourself as a real man, you might in turn come to believe that your dick must be smaller than a real man's would be. I suppose it's a case of the cart leading the horse (yes, I just said "horse" in a post about dick size--insert your own joke here).

So, playing around with this topic, I've made some captions that are Advertisements, similar to what I've been posting lately. Except, these are for a company that specializes in taking men with small dicks and turning them into women, because if you can't have a big one, what's the point in having one at all? Or you could say, "if you can't please 'em, join 'em."

Virgo

2010-08-14T04:39:00.000-04:00

Dreamscape #6

2010-08-11T17:59:00.001-04:00

It's been awhile since I've done one of this series. For those who haven't seen them, "Dreamscapes" offer a peek into the actual subconscious minds of men who I've put under a spell that slowly and gradually turns them into women.

Advertising #6

2010-08-09T05:18:00.001-04:00

Leo

2010-08-07T04:24:00.000-04:00

Poll results

2010-08-05T01:09:00.008-04:00

Well, the results are in! Although many of you would voluntarily don a female bodysuit, it looks like more people would prefer to be forced into one against their will. Like I said, I enjoy both kinds of fantasy. So, to celebrate the victory, here's a series of caps about a man who finds himself the victim of a forced bodysuit feminization. Enjoy!

And here's an extra one, just because I'm feeling silly:

Advertising #5

2010-08-04T10:14:00.002-04:00

Check out more work from Arthur de Pins here.